The countdown has officially started. It is just over two months until my book is officially released. It drops on Amazon, both a Kindle edition and in paperback form. I am currently waiting for the last round of edits to come back to me, and then the book will go off to one more edition – this one a sensitivity reader. I am determined to make sure my book is as solid as it can be.
I am quite frankly astonished at how many things I have been able to accomplish with this release of my book. I can’t help but compare when I tried to publish the very first (and very unfinished) first edition of my book 7 years ago. I did not know what I was doing, I still had so much to learn, and go through, and yet here I am once again. I decided a few days ago that it was time to start building my platform on TikTok and connecting with fellow survivors and exvangelical people there. I have never been able to comfortably listen to podcasts, but I currently have 4 different podcasts I am reaching out to, and have close connections to through multiple friends.
I’m doing the shit and I am so impressed with myself! Yeah, yeah, maybe that’s vain, but honestly I do not care. I am proud of myself for what I have been able to do. My story is coming out, and I am excited, a little anxious, but I know what I’m doing, and I’m that much closer to reaching the things I have long long dreamed of doing.
So without further adieu, allow me to introduce…..
The book – in both forms – drops on April 5th of this year. And fuck am I ready for it.
I chose the title “Profligate Truth” for a variety of very personal and significant reasons. The biggest is that it’s a bit tongue-in-cheek for me. Many of the synonyms of Profligate are labels I have been called or have been told describe my “truth/story.” So why the fuck not use the things my parents and others have thrown at me? I’m reclaiming the power of that word. My story is dirty, it’s uncomfortable, it is the story of a prodigal who will never return to the “folds of the Church.” The visceral nature of my story is it’s power, and I am leaning in to that wholly.
The second biggest reason is that “Profligate Truth” was the name of my first true deconstruction blog roughly a decade ago. It was a space that when I was done deconstructing, I poured out my process all over those pages. That particular blog was picked up by an exvangelical blog space called “SGM Survivors.” I was one of a handful of blogs featured in that space.
I cringe to remember what I wrote and thought back then. I also know that not only did I shake a bunch of people up with my writing, my words also resonated deeply with even more people. My words and my story made so many other people feel less alone and helped them feel seen in their own darkness and their stories.
So by calling my book the name of that old blog and my first deconstruction space, I am coming full circle. I have finished a MASSIVE chapter in my life, and to celebrate that ending, I am pushing out the book detailing that journey. I mean, am I ever truly finished healing and rebuilding from the things that were stolen from me and so many others? Fuck no. This is a lifelong process. What I mean by “finished” is that I am not longer needing to focus solely internally and now have energy and mental space capable of pushing outwards and focusing EXternally.
My book is available for pre-order for Amazon Kindle. Unfortunately Amazon does not allow for pre-orders for paperback editions. Annoyingly so. But the paperback will drop on April 5th, the same time the kindle edition is released. Click on the picture of the cover above, or click HERE for the pre-order.
Profligate Truth 
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